Monday, April 19, 2010

Miss Ava.....

Last night you fell out of bed. I was sitting on the couch and heard a big thump in the next room. I ran in to find you laying on the floor with wide eyes and silent, giant tears coming out of your eyes. You just looked at me so helplessly. I scooped you up (not easily cause you are almost too big for me to carry) and brought you out to the couch. You fell right back to sleep and I just sat and stared at you. I couldn't believe how big you are. You don't even fit on my lap any more. I watched you sleep and thought about how much I love you. I wish that I could protect you from everything that will ever hurt you. But I can't. I have to let you grow. All I can do is love, teach and try my hardest to prepare you for life. I feel so inadequate.
You have been a trial and joy lately. Your personality is blossoming more everyday. You are hard to handle sometimes and there are so many days I wonder how I am going to survive now and let alone when you are a teenager. You are into writing things lately and ask me multiple times a day how to spell words. You are getting so smart that you know how to write most letters from memory, but sometimes I have to write words out for you to copy. On Sunday you showed me a list you were making of all you best friends. You wrote "mom" three times and said it was cause I was your best, best, best friend. It was so cute and made me feel so special. You are my best friend too! I was also touched by the other people who were included in your list, your aunt, cousins, your doll, and Sharon.

I hope that you will always want to be my friend, and while I will always want to be your friend I know that being you Mom is so much more important. It will not always be easy and some days you will not feel like I am your best friend. Just always remember that nobody in this world loves you and knows you the way that I do. You are amazing and beautiful!
Love,
Mom

P.S. Tonight you asked me if I knew that farting in the bathtub made bubbles! Hahahahaha it was awesome :)

2 comments:

Rachel said...

beautiful post. You are a great mom with a beautiful and lucky little girl to have you. Enjoy her.

Grammy said...

Julie, what sweet sentiments. Yes, a mother's heart strings tie us to the most amazing people. How lucky we are to be mothers. It is amazing to love as we love our children. I did not know the power of such love until I held my own sweet babies in my arms. I love you so much!